We all want to be beautiful, attract friends, lovers, jobs, whatever.  Don’t judge yourself. We are communal creatures. And being attractive is more than your appearance. Without deep connection to who you are, the beauty on the outside is a complete disconnect. But when you have beauty from within, your light shines.

Let’s be honest. Through our life experiences, we become jaded. We put up walls to protect ourselves. We believe that wearing a mask is the best way to function in society and be accepted.  Well, I am here to tell you that being who you are in the easiest step toward your most beautiful self.

Confidence, acceptance, non-judgment, and curiosity are the source of beauty. Did you hope that these tips were good skin care, a fitness routine, and healthy diet? Heck, any image consultant can tell you that, but the true source of beauty is from within. Ugh… and that’s hard. So, what are some tips for building these characteristics?

  1. Pay attention to negative self-talk. You cannot expect to exude beauty if you keep telling yourself that you look old or fat in the mirror.  Try this exercise. For a day, recognize a negative statement you are saying to yourself. Then write down on a piece of paper (I suggest an index card because it fits into a pocket) the opposite of this negative talk. That’s right, the opposite. If you think, “I look big in this skirt,” write down, “my hips look amazing in this skirt.” At the end of the day, review your statements. What did you learn?
  2. Wear something that makes you uncomfortable. The goal here is to find the difference between your walls and your fears. Sometimes we want to wear a sequin skirt or leopard print. We see someone else do it and think, “she can do that, but I can’t.” You know why she can do it? She just did. So my suggestion is to try out something you are afraid of and act confident. Even fake it for a day. What happens?
  3. Change your judgment language. Instead of saying “this is hard,” or “that’s disappointing,” or “I hate this,” try exploratory words, like interesting, curious, fascinating, unexpected, surprising, etc. By changing your language from negative to non-judgment, you will find a change in your demeanor. You will be lighter and happier. Language is powerful!
  4. Assume ignorance. Most people say to not make assumptions, which is true. But if you are going to assume anything, assume ignorance.  Ignorance is just a lack of knowledge or information. It is likely that if someone doesn’t understand you then they will judge you. Assume that they need more information or knowledge. Be open to them even if they are closed to you. And assuming ignorance keeps you open.

There is an inner light that comes from confidence, acceptance, non-judgment, and curiosity. No matter what you wear, you can wear these attitudes every day and experience a life makeover.

To find out more about shifting your perspective, check out our life coaching workshops at www.beyoulivebig.com.